Draw a Crowd

Original Artist: Ben Folds Five

Damn

I ordered something
It took a while
This morning something
was on my doorstep

What's this I'm holding?
Time Capsule order
Cause I'm a brand new man
And I don't think I want it

I don't think I want it

A row of flags
Hanging behind me
A garden of mics and questions
And photo flashes blind me

And I'm so high
I can't recall my statements
I only know I made 'em
Because my face vibrated

(Is it all in my mind?)
I could have sworn I saw it
(I thought I was fine)
Defined is what I call it

Oh, if you're feeling small
if you can't draw a crowd,
draw dicks on the wall

Oh, if you're feeling small
and you can't draw a crowd,
draw dicks on the wall

I was gruntled when
It was just feet on gravel
to have come apart
I must have once been ravelled

Now when pretty phrases
don't mean a thing
And I want to settle
I sing the line again

So smooth you can hear the beard
So smooth you can hear the beard (you can hear the beard)
Three times is poetry
So smooth you can hear the beard

Oh, if you're feeling small
and you can't draw a crowd,
draw dicks on the wall

Oh, if you're feeling small
and you can't draw a crowd,
draw dicks on the wall
if you can't draw a crowd,
draw dicks on the wall

And if you can't draw a crowd
Settle for what you can draw

I'm just sayin'

I-I-I-I'm just sayin'
what is sayin
that I'm just sayin'
lend any weight
to what I'm saying

Oh it's come back again
I can't ignore it
I'm a brand new man
but I'm still paying for it

Oh, if you're feeling small
and you can't draw a crowd
draw dicks on the wall

Oh, if you're feeling small
and you can't draw a crowd
draw dicks on the wall
if you can't draw a crowd
draw dicks on the wall
if you can't draw a crowd
draw dicks on the wall

And if you can't draw a crowd
Settle for what you can draw

I only wanted
to be Stevie Wonder
But I got to settle
for this vanilla thunder
(If you can't Draw a crowd)
Oooh, this vanilla thunder
(If you can't Draw a crowd)
Oooh, this vanilla thunder
(If you can't Draw a crowd)
Tears of vanilla thunder
(You can't draw a crowd, if you're feeling small)

Stats:

27 known live performances.
First performed: 2012-09-30 - Chicago Theatre, Chicago, IL, US.
Most recently performed: 2016-10-22 - The Gallo Center for the Arts, Modesto, CA, US.